The girl of my dreams

Some days start out better than others. And for that very reason, the fall from joy can be that much further and that much more painful. Take today for example. I awoke from a dream about my beloved. As I lay there I kept thinking back to the dream. You see, just before I slept I prayed that God would give me a dream about her. I needed to see her, hear her, and touch her again and the only way I can do that now is through a dream. I pray that prayer many nights and most nights I don't remember dreaming about her. But this morning I did. It was such a real dream that I stayed in bed past the time the alarm went off just to reflect on what I had dreamed. But then I had to face my day. 

Do you ever have those evenings where you feel more in love with your spouse than others? You had a date night where he or she treated you to a good meal and maybe a movie or other such entertainment. You fall asleep in each other's arms and everything is wonderful. You wake up in the morning still basking in the glow of the evening before. You can hardly wait for the work day to end so you can be with your love again. The next evening may not be as wonderful as the previous but you still can't wait to see them; hold them; and tell them you love them. That's the feeling that I woke with. It's amazing to me that I can be more in love with someone than the day before when we never interacted. But I am. 

And then comes the fall. I don't get to go home and tell her what a wonderful time I had and how much I love her. Not tonight. Not tomorrow. Not ever again. And so the party begins. But instead of crepe paper streamers marking the occasion, it is filled with streaming tears. Yes, the pity party has begun and I find myself the guest of honor again. I write this at work because I can't find myself going home to the empty house. I have no "but at least" at home. 

My beloved was the love of my life even when I failed to make her feel it. But I know in my heart that she knows that she truly was my one and only. She was, is, and always will be, the girl of my dreams. So perhaps I will go home. I will kick off my shoes and lay on the couch (after I out the shoes up of course because she would want it that way), and take a nap for a bit. For perhaps there I can once again be with the girl of my dreams. 

http://youtu.be/UoxXhD-Prb4