Is there Mother's Day in heaven?

She refused to stand. 

"Honey, the pastor asked you to stand."

"No he didn't. He asked all the mothers to stand. I'm not a mother anymore."

I'm not sure which Mother's Day it was since the loss of our only child. I believe it to be the third or fourth. But, regardless, my wife refused to stand. And no matter what I said to convince her, she would not be budged. And to think she called me stubborn. 

I will never know what it is like to lose someone you gave birth to. Someone you carried in your womb for 40 weeks. Someone you nursed through infancy.  I only know what it is like to say goodbye for this lifetime to my only child. One that I loved as much as my wife did. But there is something to be said about the relationship a child has with her or his mother. And the severing of that relationship was something my wife could never get over. It was like the umbilical cord was being cut all over again 

I'm blessed to still have my mother. I'm blessed that she remains a Godly mother in spite of losing, first her granddaughter, and then her daughter-n-law. There are few who have had to go through the trials of these losses. And I know she hurts even more when she sees her son go through the pain I have had to endure. And yet she still manages to give glory to God for His many blessings. 

The same holds true for the woman I have the honor of calling my mother-in-law. Still. How would you, my dear reader, feel if you had to attend the funeral of your granddaughter... And then your husband... And then your own daughter? Can you imagine the pain she must be feeling? And yet she too, although angry at the circumstances, hasn't turned away from our God. 

They are not alone in this journey of grief. Ladies (and even some of you men), as you go about your day on Mother's Day you will encounter several people who will tell you Happy Mother's Day. You will thank them and probably say the same in return. It's become habit. So much so that you are more than likely to return the wishes to a guy. But what about those who struggle with the day? What about the young man who sits silently on the seat next to you in church that only wishes he could tell his mom just one more time how much he loves her? And what about that woman who sheds silent tears thinking about the child that should be wishing her a happy day that never got to see the light of it? The woman who lost a child after raising her? The woman who sits by the phone just praying that the child she hasn't heard from in three years would call just this once? The unwed mother who holds her child close and raises her chin against the shame she sometimes feels?

Today you will fight the crowds at a local restaurant to celebrate with your mom this day that had been set aside to honor her. But before you do may I make a suggestion? Put yourself in the shoes of another for just a few minutes. Seek out that person you know may be having a difficult day and embrace them. Weep with them. Pray with them. Then, Mom's, once you have, please push those feelings to the back and enjoy your day! You've earned it. 

Whether your child is with you in spirit or in flesh you are a Mom! And you are special. 

And, to my mom, happy Mother's Day. And to my lovely bride, I pray you enjoy your first Mother's Day with your children in heaven. Save a place for me.